Tuesday 17 November 2020

Have I lost the will to study?

A looming essay on Barkers Hypothesis is calling me.

Apparently, my peers are suggesting there is a lot to this essay and we need to create 3000 words on it. So here I am procrastinating.  Finding that I have so much else to do in the throes of buying and selling houses and creating myself a massive portfolio of properties which might actually mean this is my main source of income. 

Perhaps alleviating the need to earn money from nutrition has brought me back to a place once again of struggling to find the passion in anything other than life and writing.  I am still passionate about nutrition actually... A dietitian from the Westminster Hospital came and reminded us all of this yesterday.  She was so engaging and interesting and a blinking nice lady.

Leaves me confused...

Ok so rewind, this post is going to take a turn...I just took a break to get my coffee and head off to the 'careers advice' workshop.  Doubtless full of people learning how to behave in an interview etc?  Anyway at the coffee shop I bumped into my Phd friend who I will call Alex.  She was telling me how she has a few health struggles.  I cut to the chase and asked if she thinks this might be because of university and the stress that goes with it.
"Oh definitely."
"So tell me something, if you could go back in time would you still do your phd?"
'Honestly?..." she paused, "No."

I smiled at this epiphany moment.  We then went on to discuss what it is I would like to do in detail. Obviously she knows a lot about the implications of being credible and making sure I do my research.  Yet her advice was priceless.  We decided between us that I definitely do not need a Phd to undertake such a job.
Embarrassed to do so, I didn't go into the new news of me house buying and all that comes with it, including hopefully enough income to not have to worry too much about working.  (Blessed.) 


While I know I am in a position to grow my writing and reviewing business, I currently am also feeling very lucky to know this platform is already taking off to the level where I have enough faith that it can happen.  I'm feeling encouraged and positive.  

But I still need to write this essay on Barkers Hypothesis!  

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